A New Route

Once as a teenager, I was four wheeling with some friends in my parents truck. As we approached some deep muddy ruts, my friend shouted "Stay out of the ruts! Straddle the ruts!" I didn't listen. I just did what I thought was best. Then what happened next was some serious high centered, stuck. It took a large amount of towing to un-stick the truck.

I have a tendency to fall into ruts in my daily routine if I'm not intentional to be free. And it takes some serious towing (or pruning) for God to bring me out of them. Lately God has made me aware of my unintentional ruts and in my distorted-thinking human mind, how easily they start. Even with warning from others, or prompting by God in other ways, I end up stuck. I stick to some of the following, and maybe you're the same. 

The way we relate to Jesus--thinking of him from our limited rut-inducing perspective puts him in a box. God does not like boxes. He is the creator of creative! Ask questions, have conversations. Be still, slow down so He can speak to you as you pray, don't just present your requests to Him.

How we study the bible--the same time and place, the same way. Be romantic with God....do something out of the ordinary!

Ministry--don't do what's always been done just for tradition's sake. Evaluate. Include new people who bring fresh perspective, try something out of your normal box--if your normally say no, say yes. If you normally say yes, say no. A different pattern led by God's spirit can refuel you as well as teach those you are ministering to. And if you are working in the spirit, it will bring you so much joy!

Friendships--serve together instead of the regular walk or coffee, pray together instead of just debriefing your busy lives. As the girls scouts sing "make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold." Include new people in your week, your lives. But be sure your old friends are valued with depth and time as well. Also be sure your friends do not take the place of priority over God and your spouse and kids.

Daily routine--for me with littles at home routine equals success sometimes, but just taking a different walking route this morning allowed me to see new things, hear God speak in a different way, appreciate God in a different way that I otherwise would have missed. Mark out some time to 'just be' with Jesus.

Choose Joy--Instead of complaining about what is wrong or not up to your expectations, choose to have contagious Joy by listing what you are thankful for what God is doing in your life, praise Him even when life is hard.

The first vivid thought from God after I came to understand what a relationship with Jesus was "Be Flexible." God kept repeating this to me as I served as a camp counselor. To flex means to bend (something pliant or elastic). Pliable. Moveable. "Be shaped by me," God says. "Don't be so stuck in your comfortable world that you miss opportunities to see me at work and to join me. I have a plan for you." 

So, after this awareness of ruts and my nature to want to be comfortable I started evaluating a lot of my daily life and how often things, good things, get stale and don't move forward. God is teaching me to break out of these patterns to thrive, not just live.

Jesus help me to live fully in the right here and now. To be pliable--bendable and molded by you. Help me to pray constantly as I wait for what is next. Being thankful and watchful for you.Amen.

The words of strangers

With children three and four, a crying fit while running errands just doesn't phase me anymore. I get it. It's boring. We are inside (shopping none the less) on a great day for running, jumping, maybe even flying a kite if the wind picks up. We drove past the park twice before returning home, and even though we've already been out for our exercise with one on a bike and one in a stroller, errands just do not get any better. 

But, we have to go out. Diapers are nill in the house and you know what that means: pin pricks and diaper dishtowels until we get some more. Not really, but this ideas from a friend of mine just took on a new twist....The Moo Through. If you're out of milk, drive right on through pick up a gallon. WITHOUT GETTING THE KIDS OUT OF THE CAR!! But with our stock of diapers plummeting, and planning ahead for all the fresh peaches that the baby has eaten just isn't possible, my husband has suggested The Moo and Poo Drive Through. Love it!

So, back to the crying fit. In this particular store I always seem to run into complete strangers with "words of wisdom." Granted, many are wise, and they actually are meaning well, but today the comment "It Only Gets Worse" as my one year old screams while I pay the cashier made me laugh out loud. Calmly retorting with a smile, "They all have their strengths," was my on the fly response. It really had me remembering about how things like this with children one and two would take me home in tears. I was overwhelmed. Days were difficult, running errands always took an hour longer than necessary because of our geographical location, I felt isolated some days, but too exhausted to reach out, I felt like a piece of myself was growing as a mom, but all the other pieces were dwindling. But it seems so long ago. It seems as though God carried me through those days swiftly, and now it is a bit hazy. So glad my husband remembers things and that we took a lot of pictures!

This time around, I am being intentional to slow down with my preschoolers, to listen and explore. With these two busy, sweet, crazy boys, it's a wonder anything gets done around our house but how I am enjoying the privilege of staying home with them! I miss my older girls at these stages, although am loving their inquisitive personalities and independence now. Every day is a gift with these four precious gifts--from spiders named "spiderman" kept in a jar, to races around the living room table, and any two items becoming a baseball and bat I'm soaking it up. 

I am praying that God will make me thrive here, find contentment here, and be still here. This is ministry. The plethora of hats most of us want to wear, pale in comparison to the investment of little disciples God has placed in our lives. Knowing these days pass so quickly and the dirty floors can wait, I will slow down. I will praise God for the reward of offspring. How blessed to have a full quiver. And to the "wise" woman in the store: it doesn't get worse. I can praise God now for healthy kids who can cry. I can have joy in the now because I know the source of Joy. Jesus.

Psalm 127:3-4:

"Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like sparrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth. Blessed is the man who's quiver is full of them."

At His Pace...His Peace.

Simplicity, Quiet. Peace. These three things have been the theme of my life the past year. Not that I have acquired them, but the pursuit of them have been my focus. It seems that many things have the tendency to take the place of Peace in my life. Including things most precious to me; my little family (or large, depending on who you ask) & close friends.  I prioritized them wrong. Before God. And how easily they were placed out of order.

Reflecting on this now, God has been good. God has been gracious. He's shown me that having no peace in our home, really meant that He was not being allowed to shoulder the burdens this life brings. Instead, I was taking them on, and even counting blessings as burdens. He showed me the mistake of making these things an idol.

As I set out into this next season, I pray. Pray that God will remind me that nothing is possible without Him...when it is a struggle, and brings me no peace or joy, it is not Him working--it's  me. Pray that He will show me simplicity is not simple. It's a quest to live differently as the world whizzes by. To find quiet. To Be still.  To know that He is to be exalted in all the earth.

Psalm 46:9-11

⁹ He makes wars cease
   to the ends of the earth.
He breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
   he burns the shields with fire.
¹⁰ He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
   I will be exalted among the nations,
   I will be exalted in the earth.”
 ¹¹ The LORD Almighty is with us;
   the God of Jacob is our fortress.

Marriage-what a gift

This fall Craig and I will celebrate 10 years of marriage. In reflecting on our wedding day, I remember what an honor and commitment we made before God and so many loved ones. Our years have flown by--ten years of marriage used to seem so far away! I was reminded of that this week as we witnessed two wonderful people pledge to love, honor, and respect each other.

But marriage is so much more than the day. It's a lifetime of relationship that will make a marriage. So often, I've found, that my attitude has been less than par toward my husband. Small things have caused pain, interruptions have happened, circumstances have accumulated and infested our relationship. But there has been much good, as well. We've grown up together, started a family, ministered together, laughed (a lot, but I wish more), cried, and stood by each other. We've grown in the depth of our relationship- a depth only Christ can provide.

It is so fun to reminisce about our first years of marriage, and although the newness of being newlyweds is no longer new, the love that I know my husband and I have for each other had not. It's only grown deeper and more firm. Praise the Lord! Watching my girls witness the wedding and their excitement for marriage was a reminder to pray for their future marriages. I pray all of our kids will marry strong believers in Jesus, who has created marriage, and who will love, honor, and respect them the way they deserve.

I LOVE my husband more every day. He is my best friend, my guide. He is such a blessing, such a gift. I love that God has kept our love for each other fresh and new.

God is good.

The Garbage Truck

Today is Garbage Day. In watching my 1 year old get so excited at the most ordinary, every day occurrence such as the garbage truck coming by our house, I am amazed at how fast this motherhood adventure is passing; my life in general is passing. It seems like just last week when my 6 year old would run to the window and be excited at seeing the truck go by. Now she's in kindergarten. My four year old would stand on her tip toes to see out the window, and she would watch the truck until she could see it no longer as it drove away around the corner. She's so independent.

In this simple thing, I am reminded of how our days are numbered. No one knows when our last will fall, only our GREAT GOD. He knows the number of hairs on our heads (Luke 12:27), he knows the span of our life, he knows how deeply we need Him. He knows what each of our days will encounter and what we will face. He knows--

Jeremiah 29:11-13 says
¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

So, if I truly believe all that He says is true, that He knows our days, He knows our span of life, then how am I living? Am I looking for His goodness throughout the day, in simple, every ordinary things? Am I thankful and praising God for this life of abundance?

I pray that this week will give way to my heart being grateful, that praise will be on my lips (Psalms 34:1), and that everyday, ordinary, routine life will be acts of worship. Even the garbage truck.

The Joys of Toys

This week will hopefully prove to be monumental in our home. We have taken away every single one of our girls toys. Now, this is not something we are doing lightly, but have been talking about for about 3 years now. Every so often when a fight breaks out over a particular coveted toy, we ask "Do you want all of your toys to be taken away?" They knew we didn't mean business--until now.

As one daughter punched the other in the nose over a toy, and the other yelled and screamed in her face, we new we needed drastic measures. Now. As this incident unfolded, I walked into their room (I wish I could say calmly, but alas, I am a sinner, and it was done with frustration--how it would have been better with self-control--I confess this Jesus). I needed to heed the Word in

Proverbs 25:28 that says:

"Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control."

Although I lacked self-control, I did ask for forgiveness and pointed out that I, too, am a sinner in need of the Grace of God. The girls are so quick to forgive---oh to be a child with that child-like faith!

So the story continues:
My husband and I began to gather each toy and put it in the hallway, as quickly and without talking. The girls looked onward with tears as they watched their favorite toys be taken from their place, and put in garbage bags and Rubbermaid boxes. We saved some of their favorite toys, but have discarded SO many! I can't believe how many toys the girls had!! We did not move that many toys here three years ago...so they had multiplied by night and over taken our lives!!

Not only was the issue about the physical fight between our kids, but the lack of thankfulness. The greed factor had crept up, and taken over my precious little girls. So, now, we are looking at the heart issue here. Greed. God's Word says this:

Ephesians 5:5

"For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God."

This is our end goal in parenting: to instill in our children a life that reflects God, so they can inherit the Kingdom of Christ and of God. So they can be with Him in eternity. Greed cannot be tolerated.

But it should not be tolerated in my life as well. How often do I as a wife, mom, child of God have an ungrateful heart? A selfish heart? A greedy heart? Way more often that I would like to admit. Sometimes my relationship with God is like my kids fighting over a toy. I pull, push, do what I have to to get my way. But the difference is God is not a sinner--He does not respond to me with frustration (translation: anger).

He has never sinned, and He is always ready to give me a dose of Grace--but also lets me suffer the consequences of my sin. Because it is a choice to sin, just as it was a choice for my children to punch and yell.

Ezekiel 44:10

"The Levites who went far from me when Israel went astray and who wandered from me after their idols must bear the consequences of their sin."

I pray, Jesus, that you would take this day and allow me to be a peacemaker, a person who shows your love to others, a person who knows that there is a judgment day. Help me live in the reality that being stuck in sin is eternal separation from you and everything good. Help me to teach my children the way they should go as I live out this imperfect life in front of them. Help me choose you. Help me to be thankful for you and all you've given.

Comfort, Oh Comfort

My daughter, 6, has been visiting the school nurse probably about 3 times a week recently. The nurse called me and told me about her regular visits--she called my daughter a frequent flier--I laughed!

The circumstances usually include a substitute teacher, which she did mention when she woke up this morning. Whenever there is a sub, she visits the nurse. When she is bored, or doesn't want to be out at recess, she visits the nurse. When there is too much noise, she visits the nurse. Well, you get the picture. We talk with her about these frequent visits, tell her about the little boy who cried "Wolf," bribe her with a trip to Dairy Queen...you name it, we've tried it. But she is not one for change, and even the smallest thing such as her teacher being out for the day, sends her into worry and insecurity.

This all got me thinking about comfort. On these days where she is needing a bit more attention, the nurse is the closest person she can think of to enlist. Someone knows her by name. She feels special. She gets attention. Someone cares about her, notices her.

Much of this way of thought is not foreign to adults. If we get down to the truth, isn't this the way a lot of us feel? We all want to be known by name. We want to feel special. We would love undivided attention, someone to are about us, notice us.

Often we put our hope in things such as people, career, parenting...to find that connection, to stand out. But, the lasting most real relationship that can give us this satisfying familiarity, is a relationship with God.

He knows us by name, from before we were born.

Psalm 139: 15-16

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

He KNOWS we are special, unique. He made us and called us good.

Genesis 1:30-31

30 And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food." And it was so.

31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day.

We are worth more than anything else he has made, and HE notices us.

Luke 12:6-8

6 Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God.

7Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.

8"I tell you, whoever acknowledges me before men, the Son of Man will also acknowledge him before the angels of God.

HE IS GOOD. HE IS THE ULTIMATE COMFORT.